Giving Up
Wednesday’s theme will be called, “What I’m Learning About…”
June 4, 2025
This seem’s to be the perfect theme for today. If you have been following my blog posting, then you probably realized that I didn’t post yesterday. Yup. I actually missed yesterday AND, it wasn’t because I forgot. I was struggling with myself. What I am learning, is honestly, more and more about who I truly am and why I do the things that I do. More specifically, in relationship to following through.
One of my biggest pet peeve’s are people who do not follow through. Who say one thing and do another. And it’s funny, that that’s something that annoys me because I do it. And it annoys me even more, when I do it. I am learning to find this balance between staying true to my word, but also being fluid about it and communicating honestly. In other words, if I make a commitment, but realize that I cannot commit, then my rule is that I must communicate honestly about it. Especially, when the commitment is to another person.
I like to look at each day, as fluid. I do my best to enact the paradox of planning and freedom. To do a basic outline of what needs to get done and move freely within that outline. Many times, unexpected thing’s happen and it changes our plans or, it forces us to become more flexible with our plans. And so, this helps me be more fluid when unexpected things happen AND, it allows me freedom to change my mind and do something different. Some people call that flaky or inconsistent and I say, many times we take all of that way too seriously. I believe life is meant to be lived spontaneously. That we can experience adventure in our every day, if we just let go of the need to control every single aspect of it. I’ve learned to treat every single moment that comes up, as if it was supposed to happen that way. It was on purpose. If I believe the universe is purposeful, than truly, nothing ever happens for nothing. That mean’s, every single moment has a lesson to be learned or, a gift being offered. And presence, is literally the key to accessing that gift.
So anyway, getting back to what I am learning about myself. I am literally, in the midst of undoing so many conditional ways of thinking that has embedded itself into my bones. I am literally, learning to re-train my nervous system. I am understanding in what ways my mind has created these stories to protect myself that no longer serve me. I am understanding that in many ways, I feared achieving my goal. I feared becoming more than I am right now and that fear disguised itself as protection and re-direction. I literally continued to self-sabotage myself. And in a sense, I feel like, that exactly what I was experiencing yesterday.
I have been slowly adding to my list of important things that I want to ensure I focus in on every day. It’s not alot either. It’s just a list of the things that I want to build momentum on, so that I can close the gap between where I am to where I want to be. I have done a decent job, but I notice how I get to a certain point in my journey and I start to talk myself out of things. I don’t go past a certain point and I end up, settling for less or, just quitting all together. Fear of change has had such a grip on me and I am really beginning to see how it has manifested in my life so far.
I have been making an effort to be on my blog every day and to commit to writing because I love it. It makes me feel so connected to myself, to God, to the universe. It makes me feel like I’m in love and emanating nothing, but love. It is the most amazing feeling in the world for me to write with the intent to teach and inspire. Yesterday, I struggled to open the laptop to get here. My mind was working against me and I gave in.
This is my true self right now and I wanted to share it with you. Not because I believe I am a failure, but because I want to remind you, that sometimes you cannot show up for yourself and your goal’s. And that’s okay. Because tomorrow, you can pick the torch back up and try again. I realized that consistency is more about learning how to continue picking up where you left off, over and over and over again, without giving up.
I used to internalize these moment’s as a persona failure, and I would give up. I just want you to know, that you are human and to not give up on yourself. The message is simple and easy, but sometimes, we just need that quick reminder. So, this is yours.
Be good to yourself, you are so deserving.
Love Always,
Ariel