Day #4 Reflection
June 13, 2025 9:54pm
Dear Reader,
Tonight, I pulled an oracle card that said, “Every Journey Begins With A Single Step.” It bring’s me to a reflection of the thing’s I actually love doing and want to align with, verses, what I am actually doing in my day to day. I love my work, I truly do. But I also am coming face to face with the reality of life in an massive way. For the first time, I can feel just how expansive life can be, and how limitless the opportunities can be. I am looking at how a majority of people, use their life to worry about mundane things, or fight to be seen, or assert their worthiness, and I see an old version of myself within it.
I reflect on the drama I would create in my life, and then play the victim. I reflect on all the thing’s I spent time becoming anxious about. Or, all the ways in which I would try so hard to prove that I was good enough. It felt so normal. It felt like, that’s just what life was supposed to be. I am realizing that it really isn’t. And, even more, that I get to choose.
“Every Journey Begin’s With A Single Step”, was an oracle card about how your inner journey, determines what manifest’s. It was a reminder to stay committed to my inner work. Eventually, I will attract all of the things that align with my true self. I must say, in day #4, it’s been an incredible inner journey. I wasn’t really expecting this journey to be so deeply internal. But pulling that card, reminds me that I must get clear on what I want and who I choose to be, if I want to manifest all the thing’s that I’ve always wanted.
I also notice feeling’s of insecurity as I become more vulnerable. Most people who know me, don’t know that I love pulling tarot and oracle card’s. They do not know that, that’s how I nourish and cultivate my relationship with God. Most people who know me, don’t now that I believe whole-heartedly in the law of the attraction. That I listen to channeler’s like Abraham Hicks and Bashar. Most of the people I know, would probably think I’m crazy, and have literally, lost my shit.
Sometimes, I feel I care more about fitting in spaces that don’t resonate, than just allowing myself to move into spaces that do resonate. I find that is an old cycle that exist’s within me - wanting to be accepted in spaces that don’t resonate anymore. It is an old acceptance and abandonment issue that will rear it’s ugly head in my direction. It used to be so damn loud, but I will say, that while it still exist’s, it doesn’t hold as much weight. It will tell me stories about how weird my friend’s and family will think that I am. It will tell me stories about how I’m going to be disregarded. I find myself wanting to fight for understanding, but I’ve come far enough to know that I shouldn’t’ have to fight for understanding in spaces where real love and acceptance exist’s. I also realize, that life is to expansive to be worried about needing to fit in anywhere. I reflect on how I always played small because of how much I just wanted to be seen, chosen and validated.
And honestly, that is literally what I see everywhere. Everyone just wants to be validated by their peer’s. People make post’s, with caption’s that say, “I don’t care what anyone thinks about me, I’m just living my best life.” And the thing I’ve noticed is, most people who are really living their best life, aren’t letting everyone know that they are. They are embodying their best life. They don’t have to try so hard or, prove that they are through photos and videos. I’ve noticed that when people are really embodying a certain truth, they never feel the need to tell anyone about it. This is by no mean’s a judgment on anyone, either. It is just an observation that I’ve made. I reflect on it because I seen an old version of myself within it, too. That’s the same shit I used to do, too.
Today, I was telling my partner that I am beginning to really understand how expansive and unlimited life is. I told him, it’s such a big feeling, that I don’t even have words for it. And maybe, I am not supposed to try to define it or translate it into words. Maybe the expansiveness of life is only meant to be experienced and felt. Maybe it just requires one to be present in every moment, bringing their true, most authentic self to every moment. Maybe it’s only then, that God can meet you, and show you just how unlimited, you truly are.
Till the morning.
Love Always,
Ariel